The Neighborhood

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Hope + Resilience

Week 1: Hope

There are various definitions of hope from various psychological, societal, scientific and religious backgrounds.

  • Miriam Webster: “to cherish a desire with anticipation; to want something to happen or be true”

  • Charles R. Snyder, Hope Researcher: “A rainbow is a prism that sends shards of multicolored light in various directions. It lifts our spirits and makes us think of what is possible. Hope is the same – a personal rainbow of the mind.”

  • Positive Psychology: “Hope is a positive motivational state that is based on an interactively derived sense of successful (a) agency (goal-directed energy), and (b) pathways (planning to meet goals).”

The theme is that hope must be specific (goal-oriented) and active by nature. It is the hope in a specific outcome. Hope can be global and individual. It is not just optimism which is simply wishing, wanting, or believing that things will somehow turn out positively and according to plan. Instead, hope is the active pursuit and participation in a desired positive outcome. It can be as general as I hope to spread love in every situation, or as specific as I hope to do well on a quiz. The key is that hope is not static or passive, it is active and dynamic.

In scripture, God is described as “the God of Hope.” Romans 15:13 says, “Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:4 says, “For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.”

If God is the God of Hope, this means God is active and has goals and desires for the world. God desires peace, joy, love and justice. When we know and love God, we become active participants in that hope.

View the week 1 crew guide here!

Week 2: Resilience

Positive Psychology defines resilience as, “that ineffable quality that allows some people to be knocked down by life and come back stronger than ever. Rather than letting failure overcome them and drain their resolve, they find a way to rise from the ashes.”

Resiliency is in levels. By simply being human and navigating various disappointments and trauma we are resilient. However, if we consciously identify characteristics we can learn to bounce back faster. You need HOPE to be resilient. Hope is active, and goal oriented. The more you can recognize that your goals are valuable, and your actions contribute to meeting those goals the faster we recover from setbacks. If we can grow in our worth and emotional health we can recognize that failure isn’t commentary about us as individuals, rather it is a minor setback that can allow us to grow and avoid the same mistakes.

The bible was written by people, about people and for people, so it is full of failure and it is full of examples of resilience. Over and over again you can read where people come back after a mistake or trust in God to give them the strength to bounce back.

Key Verses:

  • 2 Cor. 4:8-9, “We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed,”

  • Galations 6:9 “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”

12 ways to increase resilience:

  1. Find purpose in your life, cultivate a sense of hope to understand that set-backs are temporary and you have the strength to endure.

  2. Establish reasonable goals by brainstorming solutions and breaking them down into manageable steps.

  3. Be gentle with yourself instead of critical. Increase your self-worth, by naming your strengths and be kind to yourself even when you fail. Take feedback as a way to further develop yourself instead of a personal attack against your identity and character.

  4. Take action to solve problems rather than waiting for the problem to solve itself.

  5. Identify your support group, and develop a community that will fight with you.

  6. Accept change, life is always moving and evolving. Be grateful for what was and look forward to what will be.

  7. Learn to name and feel and balance your emotions, they are a sign that something is off.

  8. Nurture yourself with healthy, positive self-care—get enough sleep, eat well, and exercise.

  9. Cultivate forgiveness by letting go of grudges and letting yourself off the hook.

  10. Face your fears and challenge yourself; expose yourself to things that scare you in increasingly larger doses.

  11. Create space for stillness. Meditate, pray and practice mindfulness.

  12. Actively reduce stress in your life by addressing the stressors instead of just relying on coping mechanisms.

Additional Resources:

Take this quiz to learn your resilience score!

View the week 2 crew guide here!

Week 3: Who is God?

We’ve defined Hope + Resilience. Through the remaining 4 weeks of this series we are going to go through 4 different ways to build hope. Faith in a higher being (so for tonight, we will look at building trust in God),

Exodus 3:14 “God said to Moses, “I am who I am.” And he said, “Say this to the people of Israel, ‘I am has sent me to you.’”

But God is so much greater. As we see above God describes themselves in a confusing and vast way. We have words, symbols, analogies and descriptors of God that can help make sense, but it isn’t enough. We need to experience and wrestle with it. Do I believe, okay what do I believe?

1 Corinthians 13:12 “For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”

Apophatic Meditation. Basic idea: god doesn’t fit our language very well. I am who I am, or I will be who I will be. No one understands God perfectly. Positive Statement, (let pictures and words of beauty come to mind), 2nd phrase is a negation (father is human male who contributes to conception, God is not a human male, God is more. Shows how limiting thoughts, words and feelings are). 3rd phrase will negate the negation. God is NOT NOT. Even our assumptions of what “not and more than mean” are still entirely confined to the human experience. By saying god is not not ___ we come to the end of language. We admit our thoughts can’t define God or even describe their own meditations. Here we are with God in the lack of understanding we can be with the great “I will be who I will be.”

Once we can have some core belief’s about who God is, we can build trust. For instance, believing that God is love, that they are not against you. Those are the things that allow us to slowly believe that there is a greater, divine purpose for the world. This gives us a HUGE boost in our levels of hope. When we have a trust in that, we can start to take the pressure off, because usually we have no idea what we should be doing.

Proverbs 3:5 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.”

View the week 3 crew guide here!

Week 4: Community

The greatest way to create a hopeful world is to support the hope of others and find others who do the same. The easiest way to control others is by destroying their hope. That is the tactic used by totalitarian governments and abusers. Learn how to be in healthy positive relationships, surround yourself with hopeful people. Help others see the best in themselves, notice their desire to make meaningful contributions and help them find their path to becoming hope-makers for themselves and others. Jesus had people he lived with and traveled with. Community is crucial, living life and loving is how we make disciples, and nurture hope for us and others.

Through our group conversation, we defined what we want community to look like in the Neighborhood.

  • Active Listening: Don’t just wait for your turn to talk or criticize, instead notice what people are saying and ask them deeper questions.

  • A non-competitive environment.

  • Being able to laugh and enjoy one another’s company

  • Clarity, transparency and honesty.

  • Setting and respecting boundaries.

  • Mutual respect.

  • Respecting one another’s differences.

  • Talking about what is really going on, not just having surface-level conversations.

View the week 4 crew guide here!

Week 5: Mindfulness

Mindfulness is being present and aware in the moment. It requires stillness and kindness. It requires kindness to ourselves in being kind enough to our bodies to slow down as well as being kind to ourselves when/if difficult or frustrating thoughts come out.

We are exhausted. Our schedule’s are too full. We constantly consume and don’t give ourselves a space to rest. We usually don’t even give ourselves enough physical rest, let alone a mental rest. By moving through life so exhausted, we become numb and unaware of most of what happens around us, we are distracted. When we grant ourselves some time and space to completely unplug, we can come back with clarity and kindness.

Last week, we talked about how Jesus deeply valued community. He also deeply valued being alone. He often went to the wilderness to pray in solitude. If we are trying to live with the same kind awareness he had, it requires a level of mindfulness.

We never seem to have enough time, but I think when we take a look at what we are doing we can evaluate where we are spending our time, and cut out unnecessary things that don’t bring joy. Studies have shown that 15 minutes a day of mindfulness improves overall productivity and lowers anxiety and depression.

When we take that time, and prioritize it, we will show up present in our own lives. We are aware of our thoughts, feelings, sensations, surroundings, which means we are functioning better in the world. We take that same kindness you have to learn in mindfulness and it makes you more kind to others, more understanding and present.

View the week 5 crew guide here!

Week 6: Finding Purpose

View the week 6 crew guide here!